Sunday, July 31, 2011

Not A High Maintenance Girl, But...

Today, I tried out the services of the local European Wax Center.  Oh, yes, I did.

And I’m well pleased...now.  I will go back, they are definitely professionals there, and they know their waxing.  But I digress...
During said service, when the lady said "Ready?" I was immediately transported to the film “40-Year Old Virgin” with Steve Carell - jump to this video!

Not that I have a hairy chest like his, or anything, so don't EVEN go there.

Waxing, which I never schedule with my aesthetician in a timely manner, due to my crazy schedule, always makes me think of nail salons.  You know, those ones where you walk in, and they want to give you wine or a margarita, and sell you everything they have?  Yeah.  Those nail salons do waxing, too.  Not me, boys and girls.  But anyway, those kind of nail salons from this point on will remind me of my new favorite comedienne.  Check her out - Anjelah Johnson.

Hope your weekend was awesome!


Oh yeah - and What The Heck Is This? contest results coming soon!

Friday, July 29, 2011

The Scott and Janie Chronicles - Part 1 - Blue Boy (RIP X 2)

Tonight, I tuned into “Gene Simmons Family Jewels.”  The one where Shannon went back to her family home in her youth.  She was emotional - her mom raised seven children as a single mom, and life was most probably hard.
It made me think about my youth.  Though my parents were married, my dad was virtually non-existent.  He was always gone - to work, to the bar, or fishing - whatever.  So, in essence, our mom was our mom and our dad.
So, from time to time, I may go back and relive memories.  I don’t have a lot, or maybe I just need to be reminded. 
Here’s one, though.  The tale of the parakeet.  And the turtle.  And two very intelligent, crazy kids...
I asked my brother for his version of this story, and I’m going to intersperse his version.  I think you’ll enjoy it - he’s a very entertaining guy!
Scott:  I have spent the last 20 hours trying to recall the whole incident and some of it is very sketchy.
We got to go to TG&Y to pick our pets. I think Mom let us do it to teach us responsibility. Yeah, right.
Jane picked a turtle. With the little plastic aquarium with the island and little tree. Remember??


Janie: I remember when my brother Scott bought a parakeet.  That parakeet’s name was Blue Boy.  I bought a turtle. I can’t remember his name.
Scott: I thought that I had got the best deal with the parakeet. I was gonna teach him to talk and he was meant to hunt horny toads and locusts with me. 
Janie: (I thought Scott hated horny toads.  But maybe it was just crawdads.  I caught both, depending upon where I was - horny toads, West Texas.  Crawdads, East Texas.  Kept in a shoebox, as long as I could, to let them go before they died. But I digress.)
Scott: The cage was small but had the drawer in the bottom for easy cleaning.This was long before the internet so we had to buy the How to Care for the Parakeet book. My heart break was quick to come because page 3 was about where I found that teaching a parakeet to talk was only slightly possible. Ole Blue Boy was good at one thing....he could make one heck of a mess in his drawer.

Mom was quick to figure out the newspaper trick and the cleaning job kinda became hers. Terry Harris and his little sister Susan were a couple of family friends that really enjoyed Blue Boy. Terry actually liked it when the bird would bite the crap out of him as he stuck his finger in the cage between the bars. As a matter of fact Terry Don was blamed for old Blue Boy’s meanness and biting ability around our house but it wasn't really his fault.
Blue Boy's cage was on a shelf in our den where our first color tv was located. He had to endure a lot of Lawrence Welk, Dean Martin, Lost in Space, and the little 11 pm target and whistle (before tv was 24\7). He became proficient at opening his cage door latch, so we started adding clothespins to thwart his efforts. But even that could not stop the Houdini bird from escaping again and again.
Janie: Somehow, one night, Blue Boy kind of freaked on our mom.  I think she went to the cage, opened the door to check on the bird, and out he flew.  He flew through the den, into the kitchen, and into a square of light caused by the kitchen light shining on the living room wall.
Scott: The night of the "Blue Boy Incident" was a school night and I had already been sent to bed and was probably dreaming of our long awaited twin princess phones from AT&T (Ma Bell back then) when I was rudely awakened by a blood curdling scream. I never did know for sure if that scream came from Mom or from the bird. 
Janie:  And just like that, Blue Boy, the beloved parakeet, was dead.
Scott: Out of bed and around the corner I ran to see my mother giving Blue Boy mouth to mouth -  and this was before the Red Cross was teaching CPR as a class.
Jane and I cried from the shock of the event but none of my tears were really for the loss of Blue Boy. He was a mean little s*%t, and I was really envious of Jane and her little turtle. Yeah, every once in a while, the water would mold and she would have to clean the tray, but the turtle never bit anyone.
Janie: Scott and I were in shock.  Our mom was in shock.  I remember our mom trying to revive Blue Boy, Scott and I weeping by her side.  But there was no life in him at all.
And of course, being the faithful children that we were, we had to have a civilized burial.  Our mom helped us conduct the ceremony, and we prayed, and everything.  Blue Boy was placed in a bed of paper, in a shoe box, and laid to rest in a hole we dug in the back yard. Amen.
And there he lay, poor Blue Boy.    Ashes to ashes, bird to dust.
End of story.
Yeah, right.  Until, of course, as curious kids are wont to do, we dug him up.  
Scott: This was about the time of the advent of the commercially marketed toy that every child of the 60's and 70's would own........The OUIJI board!!! I remember Janie and I working the little plastic pendulum shaped board viewer around the board asking questions. I never did believe that she was not moving the device. During one session that weekend the mystic OUIJA board must have channeled one of the twilight zone episodes because we decided that we should exhume Blue Boy and revive him with our new found power.
Janie: Poor Blue Boy didn’t get to rest in peace for very long.
Scott: We had buried him in a shoe box wrapped in newspaper (hopefully not from the bottom of his cage) about 6 feet from the back door so we did not have far to travel.

If you have ever seen Janie with her determined face on then you know how Mom snapped off that we were up to something. She always wondered how Mom knew when she was up to something and leading me astray -  but I never let on that it was written all over her face. 
But I digress....
Janie: Stop it, Scott, that’s my line!  And I’m older!! Dibs!
Scott: Mom caught us, right as we opened the box and unwrapped the stiff not yet rotting corpse -  and was mortified by our action. 
Janie: Blue Boy was quickly re-committed to the ground, back in his shoebox casket, and back in his original burial ground. 
Scott: We quickly reinterred our beloved (not) pet and tried to explain our actions but it was all for naught. 
Janie: We were in deep poop with our Mamma, who was plenty horrified and couldn’t believe she had raised children that would do such.a.thing!
Scott: Mom never did let us forget her horror even if she did later admit that the OUIJI board and the Episcopalian education she worked so hard to provide were kinda counter productive.


Now if you thought that that was entertaining let me tell you the story of the Rabbit and the Duck. Yep the Duck named Bruce...... 
Janie: Oh, my God.  I’d forgotten all about Bruce the Duck, Scott.


Wednesday, July 27, 2011

What the Heck? A Janie Contest!

See this?

Do you have a CLUE what this is?
I didn’t even notice it.  Until we were in line in the local drive through.  And one of my girlfriends, Jenaya, said, “What is that?”
Me: “I don’t know.”
We drove closer.
Jenaya:  “Oh, gross!”
Me:  “What is it?”
She said, “I think it’s .....”
Me:  “Why do you think that?”
Jenaya:  “It’s exactly one car length apart.  Like they’re sitting in line, and then they’re moving up one car length.”
I looked.  She was right.  Of course.  She’s an engineer.  She was also closer to the event, by right of the fact that I was driving.
I couldn’t believe my eyes.
What is it?  The answer is NOT:  a green fence.
First to answer correctly wins a prize! *jenaya is excluded



Tuesday, July 26, 2011

The Brand on Amy

I heard it through the grapevine - the blogger grapevine, that is.

"It" was the news that Amy Winehouse was dead.

We all knew her, through her music (first) and through reports of her addiction (second).

Some bloggers made fun, some grieved the loss, some talked about her entry into the "27 Club" - the club of those entertainers that died before their time, at the age of 27.

I knew but one thing - for a little girly like that to be so messed up, she had to be self-medicating her pain.  If you've ever known anyone with an addiction, you know of which I speak.

And now, a blog post from a friend of Amy's, one who had been in the same place (rehab) not too long before Amy hit the scene.

Read Russell Brand's blog and tribute to Amy.

And Diane, my friend from Blue Ridge Gal?  Thanks for the heads-up to an article that rings purely of truth.

May Amy's family and friends find peace and comfort.

Ladybugs, Ladybugs...from High Sierra Ladybugs

I’ve been ordering ladybugs lately.
No, seriously.  Would I tease you about something like that? Oh.  I would? Daaaaang, people.  But, to get back on the ladybug trail, I have.  Been ordering.
Live ladybugs.
By the thousands.
I love my little flower garden and container garden, and I read somewhere that ladybugs are the bomb when it comes to controlling insects, like aphids.
And as an avid (not aphid) hibiscus grower tender, well, aphids love my place.
But those avid aphids are about to. go. down.  I'm done with them, and I'm gonna be done with them organically.
Here’s how these little devourers of aphids come - in an almost tupperware container.  With a little mesh net on the top.  They’re stinking up my refrigerator.  They needed to take a little nappy poo, and may do so for a month or two.  I’m trying to wait until the temperatures go down a little bit to release them just so they’ll live longer.

I have pulled a few out, to warm them up, for release.  Two little sisters are coming over to help with the release, and of course, I’ll have my camera ready.
I told Chuck at www.highsierraladybugs.com that I liked to split the ladybugs up, and have the children do the release for a photography moment.  He is sending me the extra containers, with twist-on lids for easier reuse.  I’m so excited!  So, Chuck, I’ve saved your site as a favorite, and I will be back for more ladybugs!  I like that your firm grows your own bugs and doesn’t harvest from other areas, as well.  Impressive!
Why do I need multiple containers?  Well, my first release was a wreck.  Between little Ava and myself, we ruined the first container.  Punched the net on the top, right in.  There were no saving 2/3 of them for later.
Here are pictures, though, of Ladybug Release #1.  We released way too many (all 5000 of them!) at once, but we had lots of fun!  She was a little overwhelmed by so many ladybugs flying into her hair, but she quickly got over it once she figured out they were harmless.  Isn’t she beautiful?


Here they come, out of the box!

They're so beautiful!

Little Ava, smiling for the camera.

You can see them starting to climb on the plants.

Ava is mesmerized.

The directions say to water prior to releasing them - so they can get a drink.  From this point
on, they'll get their moisture from eating fat, juicy aphids.  Gross.

I don't know what's cuter - her little finger, her bracelets, or that little ladybug!

Now she wants to catch them all again.

Ava was so cute.  Maybe we'll get a rerun and put her hair in a ponytail so you can
see all her awesome expressions as she releases the ladybugs!

Monday, July 25, 2011

Venus vs. Mars

Wife’s Diary:
Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it. Conversation wasn't flowing, so I
suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much.

I asked him what was wrong; He said, 'Nothing.' I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it. On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving.

I can't explain his behavior I don't know why he didn't say, 'I love you, too.' When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely,
as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent. Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep; I cried. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.

Husband's Diary:

A four putt? Who the hell four putts??

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Thank You, Goddess!

I am so honored.
I was awarded the Goddess button!  Yup!  For the second time, I was mentioned on the Goddess’ Posts of the Week list for my “Dry Dry Dry” post.  I honestly don't know how she does all she does - and then figures out the best blogs of the week?  Wow.  I am so honored (didn't I already say that?), and for those of you that are new to my blog, coming via the Goddess, you are welcome here to Mi Vida Loca!
The first time I was awarded was in June, when this happened to me enroute to Alaska for vacation.  I had to write about it, that sweet lady broke my heart as she sobbed in the airport.
And this time, it is for my half-plagiarized joke e-mail I received.  I did tweak it, and add to it.  I feel a little guilty.  It is funny, too!
But it is dry in Texas, and I can prove it.  Because my darling little brother and I went trekking Friday afternoon through the oilfields.  The same oilfields that were burned to a crisp about three weeks ago.
And I, being the ammy photographer who wants to get a Pulitzer be somewhat recognized for her merely wanna-be portraits and frantic capturings of everyday life stupid I think they should be posted on every wall in North America pictures try as I may I never quite master the natural lighting ,took some photos.
Just so you could see how Dry Dry Dry it really is out here.


We are top of a hill, looking down at the destruction.

Hundreds of thousands of acres.

A sign of hope - a deer hoof print.

And this?  Looks like water.  But it is...salt.  Dry saltwater river bed. 

Here, at bottom of hill, looking back up to the green.  Across another salt flat.

At the edge of the burn.  See it?  And these are all baby salt cedars,  growing back.
They will ruin the land. Livestock won't eat them.

Closeup of baby salt cedars.  They can grow 12-16' tall

Beautiful - but I don't want them on my land.



Looking up to the hill where we started.

Burned mesquite tree.  Beautiful, even dead.  But look
at the bottom - a new tree is beginning.
Mesquite tap roots grow deep - so should we.

An entire yucca family - dead.  Those little clumps?
They were clusters of grass.

Mequite family - deceased.

Another sign of hope - baby grasses.

Cactus family - deceased.


Healthy prickly pear cactus on another portion of land.
My hunting dogs wish cactus didn't exist!

We SO need rain.  This has been going on for months, no rain and plenty of wildfires. Lots of the fires are started by mere static electricity.  And these fires are killing people, livestock, and wild animals.  


When good ol' West Texas and New Mexico come to your mind, please offer up a prayer for rain - we will be eternally grateful.


And did I say thanks for coming by?  I greatly appreciate it.  And Goddess?  You rock!

Honey - Wake Up! What Was That Noise?

For those of you who can't sleep at night anyway....
yet another reason to stay awake.

Holy sinkhole, Batman!


Thursday, July 21, 2011

Prayers Needed For Rosaria

Those of us who blog develop, over time, relationships with our commenters, who are most usually bloggers.  One of my constant commenters, as I ventured forth on this new blog, has been Rosaria of Sixty-Five What Now.   Her blog is a delight to read, and her journey amazing.  She is sweet, peaceful, and is a deep well.  
I’m writing to ask you to please keep Rosaria and her family in your prayers and thoughts.
She lost her youngest son, her beautiful son, Brian, this past Sunday.  
They all enjoyed the July 4th weekend together, along with Brian’s beautiful fiancee Janet.
Lord, I pray you settle peace and comfort over this family as they mourn for their son - their sibling and friend. 




Dry, Dry, Dry...How Dry Is It?

Received this via e-mail, and edited it a little...


It’s so dry here in Texas, that if we all cried huge tears for an hour, it would be more moisture than we've seen in 10 months! 


Other reports received:
  • A buddy out of Longview Tx.  said he'd killed a mosquito that was carrying a canteen.  
  • A man in Dime Box Tx.  said the chicken farmers were giving the chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.
  • In Lake Palestine Tx. , they caught a 20 lb catfish that had ticks on it!
  • But just this week, in Bryan Tx., a fire hydrant was seen bribing a dog.
  • It's so dry in Texas that the Baptists are starting to baptize by sprinkling, the Methodists are using wet-wipes, the Presbyterians are giving out rain-checks, and the Catholics are praying for the wine to turn back into water.  
Now, people, THAT's Dry!








Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Get Along, Little Cowbaby

Thought I’d share baby Cole’s pictures with you.

Cole is one beautiful baby.  And I don’t say that lightly.
I tried to plan a little beforehand, and wanted to pay homage to this little one’s heritage.  His mom hails from a ranching background, so I told Cole's parents to bring their boots and hats.  Here, Cole is actually nestled in his daddy's felt.

And then I remembered my rope basket.  I store all the doggy leashes and toys in it.  I dumped it out, and voila. This basket is made from ropes that my son used - isn’t this a great idea?

 And yes, that felt hat was a wee bit dirty.  I told Cole's dad - if that's all the dirt he gets into in his life, he's way ahead.

I love this little cocoon I purchased through Etsy.




I promise this sweet baby is so beautiful I could put him in a box and he'd look gorgeous.




And of course, Zack the Babysitter Wonderdog had to get in on the action.