Choot Like A Girl

I love small town truck stops.

You never know what you're going to see there.

I saw this t-shirt, and it made me smile.

Heck, it made me wanna go shoot my shotgun.  I'm a little behind this year, anyway.

Love the smell of shotgun smoke!

Yup...Another Holiday!

I feel it's my job to let you know when you might have missed another holiday.

I bet you didn't even know about this one.  

I know I didn't.

Yup.  Yesterday was World Potty Day.

For your viewing pleasure, I thought I'd research some toilets of the past and future for you.  Because me and Google Images, yeah, we gots it going on, babe.

Yeah.  You're welcome.

Now this would be cool.  Well, until the fish went bye-bye.

I like this one.  Seriously.

Styling and profiling while you're...yeah.  Nevermind.

I do not even know.

I'm really really scared of this one.  It might be just paper - because it says it will be "found invaluable".

Ummmm....no.  No way in hell.  Not me.  EVAH.

Now this is a different take on things, huh?

Notice you have your reading light, your decorative bowl, your heavy arm rests and a drink holder or ashtray (not sure)
AND you have your decorative toilet brush holder.  Plus, of course, the gravity flush pull chain.

I have nothing to say.  Well, I could.  I still know people that have wooden toilet seats.

You must feel edified.

So, write November 18th down next year...so you can plan ahead for World Potty Day.

What the heck?  Who comes up with this s...tuff?

Don't forget to get plenty of fiber in your diet.

Weird Breakfast...or, Asparagus Is My New Best Friend

My favorite breakfast -  in.the.world.

Seriously.

Give me steamed asparagus for breakfast and I am happy, happy, happy.

I know. 

I’m weird.

We love the frozen whole spears.

And a 10 oz package yields 9.7 grams of protein.  Not a bad way to start the day.

Like I said, I’m weird.

It could be worse.  Heck, It Has Been Worse.

But I'm pretty healed up now, and for the most part, eating better for me.

Boots and Must Have Accessories - Part 1

Who, seriously, doesn’t love boots?  Men, women, who cares, we all LOVE boots!

As you can see, I do.

So I wanted to introduce you to my two newest boot accessories.

This...is not a toy.

This...is serious business.

Because, I have large calves.

This tool helps me buy regular boots of superb quality (on sale) and stretch the calves a little bit.  (Okay, quite a lot.)

It looks wicked, doesn't it?  I saw this little tool one day at Merry Marketplace, where one of the vendors was putting it to use on a pair of $800 boots.  I was all in her business, asking her about that tool.  I decided right there and then I was going to get not one, but two.  TWO boot stretchers.

Now, far be it from me to buy a pair of $800 boots (well, maybe someday), but I have been known to thrown down a couple of hundred on a half price pair!

I’m NOT stupid, people.  Leather boots are an investment.

Here’s how that little tool works.

You wet the inside of the boot with a spray bottle (I used RO water).

You insert the tool into the leather boot. (Make sure you loosen any buckles.) The spreader has two parts - one, to spread the ankle, and one to spread the upper part of the boot.  

And you turn it to the right.  The spreader stretches the leather.

Takes about 5 minutes a boot.

And voila, they fit...just right!

(Stay tuned for part 2…it will be worth it!)