If you were Sherlock Holmes...
And if you were familiar with the life patterns of this house...
By looking at this picture, you would know these things to be true and self-evident:
1. It's early morning.
2. The dogs have eaten breakfast.
3. They're both under the covers for their wee nap before Mom heads to work. (Zack, close to me, and Zanna, away from me.) At least one paw must be outside the covers. (Sounds like some hormonal women I know.) And believe me, they are SNORING.
4. Mom's already caught up on emails AND blogging AND Facebook for the morning.
5. Next, I will shower, blow dry my hair, get dressed.
6. Last act before I head out the door will be for me to brush my teeth, at which point, without even being told, both dogs will stretch their way out from under the covers.
7. Zanna will immediately head out to the outside kennel and wait at the gate for me to let her in.
8. Zack will make it as far as the back door, will sit down, and have to be called to "Kennel, Zack!" at which point he will slowly lumber to the kennel gate and enter. At. His. Own. Pace.
Now, that, people, is ritual.
(Did you know that today is Mutt's Day? Yeah. So...Happy Mutt's Day! Go buy your four legged barky friend(s) a treat! Tell them ThatJanieGirl made you do it.)
My husband and my brother and a lot of my friends call me the dog whisperer (Move over, Cesar Milan). My dog-walker often calls or texts for advice. I don’t think I know that much, but I do try to “think like the dog”. My sister-in-love is a dog rescuer and rehabilitator. She’s the dog whisperer, I would say.
We’ve trained our dogs to go to the bathroom on command. They’re hunting dogs, so we might be in Timbuctoo for a field trial, limited time on our hands, and they need to have voided prior to going in for their competition. So we taught them to perform their “duties”, as it were, via the command, “Hurry.” On leash or off, they’re pretty automatic. (Hey. Don't be hating. It's better than being the only girl in a cadre of camo-upped guys at a competition, taking your dog to do his/her business, and saying, "Go pee-pee now, Zack*, honey. Then go out there, be the man, and retrieve that bird." Right? Right?)
So, in conversation, I was talking to my sister-in-love about how going to the dog park is such a trip for dogs, and why they tend to ignore you, ignore commands, etc., off leash and at the park. In speaking, I alluded to the dog park being like an overcrowded shopping mall for the serious shopper. There is just too much going on at a super busy mall, crowded with kiosks, cookie booths, people selling, selling, selling - too many scents - there have been way too many people there and too much to see. It's overwhelming.
Back to the dog park - take a dog to a dog park, he’s NOT going to pee or poop on command. There have been too many “dogs” in what he now views as "His Park". He’s going to go check their calling cards, right? It's a dog rule. It's the dog version of LinkedIn. We could name it "SniffedIn."
Thus, the conversation, on Facebook, no less, last night. She cracks me up.
But I'm still right. "Think like the dog. Be the dog." And Lisa - I love you.
*Zack - our Wonderdog
