Friday, December 31, 2010

Come A Little Closer Now Baby...

(This is a repost from my prior blog.  But it's real, people!)

Earlier this week, ThatManILove and I had a movie date.  We split salad and lasagna at at Pizzeria Venti, then headed to the movies.
We went to see "Date Night", the comedy with Steve Carell and Tina Fey.  The movie had probably been at our theatre 2 days, so we knew that most likely, the theatre would be crowded.
We were the first couple in the theatre, so for once, we sat in the middle of the second row from the top.  (We’re usually side seat aficionados.)  Our theatres are of decent size, for a mid-size Texas town, so there are plenty of seats.
We were early, and I was talking long distance to an old friend from North Carolina, and having a good time. ThatManILove was playing poker on his crackberry.  In about five minutes, a couple came and sat down on our row, about three seats down from me on my right.  And five minutes later, another couple came and sat the exact same distance from ThatManILove, on his left.
ThatManILove starts muttering.
Then, six people, who obviously go to the movies together all the time (I’ve seen them) came and sat...directly in front of us.
I’m still on the phone with my friend, and whispering the play by play to her.  She’s laughing hysterically, and I’m trying not to do the same.  ThatManILove is starting to steam.
People.  The entire theatre was empty.  No one was on the side seats, no one was seated in the lower section.  
The “Dancing Boxes” (what I call the previews) start, and I get off the phone.  But not before 4 people come and sit directly behind us.  I kid you not.
ThatManILove was grumbling.  I turned to him and asked him, “Did you order those special attractant pheremones from one of those funky 1-800 numbers or something?  Because these people are sticking to you like glue, baby.  Glue!” recap, we were instantly surrounded by 2+2+6+4 people.  The theatre didn’t fill up.  So, Including ThatManILove and myself, there were now 16 people in the theatre.  All smacking on their popcorn, kicking our seats, and talking amongst themselves.  Surrounding us.  In a theatre that probably seats at least 200 people.
And we were dead smack in the center of the top section of 12 seat rows, totally and irrevocably surrounded.  You just can’t get much closer than that.
I think we’ll repair to the side seats next time.


  1. I('d sit by the exit, if I were you!

    The very best of all Good new Years to you and yours - including THEMANULOVE.

  2. Too funny.

    When the movie "What Lies Beneath" first came out, we went to see it.

    There was a scatter of people all across the theatre, totally unlike what you just described. . . until. . . closer to the end of the movie, we realized everyone had inched closer until we were all in the middle, in a huddle, feet on the backs of seats. . . all together. . . just in case something from beneath tried to get us. . .

    It was funny to see


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